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You are here: Pandora’s Box - Dating - Dating Advice |
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It is important to know what you want in a man. This might sound cheesy, but draw up a list of the qualities for your Dream Man. Unless DNA research advances at the speed of lightning and they can create Mr Perfect, don’t expect every one you meet to have all these qualities. What would be important to you? Does he need to own a house? A car? Be well dressed? Be courteous? Be sensitive to your needs? Use your list carefully, don’t mark a guy down just because he does not meet one of your requirements, he might have some qualities you never thought of but that can blow you away when he shows them. Don’t be afraid to find Mr Right. Tell people that you would like to be in a relationship, and if they know of any single hunks to tell you. Don’t fall for the first guy either. See a few guys, let them all know that you would like to get to know them, so there is no issues later on when you decide one of them is after all your Prince Charming. |
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Go on dates with the prospective candidates. And don’t hesitate to take initiative here. If you really fancy a guy, ask him out. If he says no, don’t stop there. You might have started a small fire in him that could turn into an inferno, and he might just ask you out later on. Don’t be vindictive when this happens, it’s his choice and you might spoil a good chance for love later. Get him alone and ask him, it might not be very nice to ask him in front of a group of people and he denies you. Be polite. Even if you feel you’re wasting your time after the first 10 minutes, keep a good attitude. The other guy might think things are going swell, while you want to pop a few Valiums, but at the end be honest about your feelings. You will not hesitate to agree another date with a great guy you want to see again, so don’t keep the wrong guy hanging on intentionally. If you’re not sure, go on one more date. Let the feeling either grow or die out, you’ll know quickly after the second date where you stand. Don’t be judgemental. Just because he wears glasses doesn’t mean he’s off the list, he might hide something very special behind them. It’s better to make sure the person inside is the one you want to kiss goodnight every night. “A pretty boy is everyone’s boy”. He might be very cute, he might know it and you might end up as just another score on his black book. That’’s not to say you must distrust every hunk you meet, just make sure he is someone with true intentions instead of a horny little rabbit on another quest. This is very important - DO NOT HAVE SEX AFTER THE FIRST DATE! You might feel yourself burning up when you first lay eyes on him, but if he is the right guy, he might think twice about going after you if you spread your legs that easily. If and when the time is right, you will both know it. The saying goes “it’s better to be friends first than lovers, than to be lovers before you’re friends”.. If you start building your relationship on sex, problems will come easily when sex is not the most important thing between you. Get to know him, find things you can talk about, and if the conversation happens naturally, you’re on the right track! Never rush this process. Date for as long as you need. Things may take a lot longer than you anticipated, or the relationship could take turns you never saw coming. If you think you have found Mr Perfect, take your time to ponder over him, his qualities, his habits displayed during the time you have been together for so far. DON’T RUSH! You will just be hurt when you wake up in the middle of the night irritated to find him snoring, and you having to creep off to the lounge just to get shut eye if you have already placed your heart on him. The longer this carries on for the harder the break-up will be. Make sure you can handle his imperfections. If you can have an easy conversation, and your heart flutters every time he takes a breath, you are close. Remember that you are not perfect either. He will have to face you in the morning or just after the face mask has been applied, so don’t be too rough on these things. When you are ready, and you know and feel in your heart that he is THE ONE, let the other guys know. Invite Mr Perfect out for another date, and use this time to discuss your feelings. Don’t start talking here about how many cats you would like to have with him. Talk to him about how he feels about you, whether he sees a future in the two of you being together. Be gentle, come on too strong and he might flee. Be honest, this is a major building block for any relationship, if he likes you and the feeling is mutual, this will be the first night of many more wonderful ones to come. When you and Mr Perfect are on the same wavelength, it’s time to start doing things together. Not with his or your friends, just the two of you. Go on picnics. Go for long walks. Spend a quiet evening in with a good bottle of wine and music you both enjoy. Really get to know him. There is nothing better going to bed with the man of your dreams, enjoy! |
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